a to z challenge – q is for questions

I have questions. Questions about what life will be like once this “hiatus” my kink partner and I are on is over; questions about what I want; questions about who I am, with and without him. This isn’t the place or time to hash all those out though. For the moment they abide in here, in my head, or are trotted out for my therapist and I to examine. There are a lot of interesting questions that have come up during this time though.


Interesting questions from different boys I’ve been chatting with recently, too. I’ve kept my toes dipped into the dating pool for awhile, in a desultory way. Not really looking, but open to being interested in, and the interest of, others. “Dating” has not been an actual, physical thing though (at least for me, and at least so far) in pandemic times, so a lot of what we do is what I call the “question game,” as we try to get to know one another. Person 1 gets to ask any question, but they have to answer it themselves too, after person 2 answers it. Then it’s person 2’s turn. The only rule is: honesty. After awhile, if you’ve gotten to know each other better, you can add the element of, “If you don’t want to answer a question, the questioner has the option to set that person a task.” And that doesn’t necessarily mean a sexual one! It all depends on where you are in relationship. It’s been a fun diversion, and a surprisingly good way to keep a text (and sometimes image) only relationship/flirtation going.

Some of the questions I’ve been asked:

How did you get into kink and/or poly?
How did you wind up out in Missouri?
What do your tattoos mean (if anything)?
What’s your favorite sexual activity?
What’s a skill you have that most people don’t know about?
What one person, alive or dead, would you have dinner with?
What’s your biggest fear?
If you could change one thing about yourself, physically or mentally, what would it be?
Dogs or cats?

Dogs – duh!

Name one regret do you have?
What are you most proud of?
If you could do anything in the world as a job, what would it be?
If you could live anywhere, where would you live?
Favorite place you’ve ever traveled?
Morning, afternoon or nighttime sex?
Why submission?
Why pain?
How do you feel about getting older?
What’s on your sex/life bucket list?
You have to change one significant thing in your life – what is it?

There have been lots more, but those are pretty common, and fun to answer. What questions would you ask in the question game?

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