a to z challenge – r is for racy, raunchy…ridiculous?

I’m thinking (super hard) about going to a (covidly appropriate) kink event tomorrow night. Masks, socially distanced unless playing, etc. A friend of mine went to the last one (these are monthly events) and said that most people obeyed the rules, that it wasn’t overcrowded, etc., and though she isn’t going herself this time, a friend of hers that I met through her is and would meet me there.

There are so many reasons I am terrified to go! But, I guess that’s one reason to go.

Anyway. I’m thinking of what to wear. And I’m realizing that I haven’t truly dressed up, in fetishwear or slutwear, since the pandemic. I dressed a little bit for the Canadian way back last winter when we were in Myrtle Beach, but…well, that was in the condo, and just for him.

And I don’t think I wore fuck-me heels.

Those of you that remember me from the Before-Days may recall what a high heel slut I am. Or was. Am I still? I don’t know.

This is now – about half of the ones I have left, and that about 1/7 of the shoes I had when W was alive. And I haven’t worn any of them since the pandemic, and not very many since he died, period. Kink partner wasn’t much into me getting slutted up, so…my shoe collection languished. And, a little bit…so did I.

Now I’m looking at my slutwear and wondering…am I too…old for this? Should I still want to dress up like this? What if I get called out for not acting like the “woman of a certain age” that I am?

But I got dressed anyway, to see what I might wear, and….damn it…I felt sexy! Racy, a little raunchy – and NOT ridiculous.

Will I feel that way tomorrow?

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